Building healthy relationships at university

You will meet lots of people while you study at university. This will give you opportunities to build friendships or romantic relationships.  

Healthy relationships help you enjoy all aspects of university life and help you feel a part of the St Andrews community.  

Everyone has different ideas of what a relationship looks like. It's important to be mindful that some relationship styles do not suit our ideas and that is okay. 

A healthy friendship means there is a foundation of trust, honesty, and respect. When we are with our friends they should empower us and leave us feeling energised about ourselves.  

It is normal for some bumps and challenges to come along the way, but if this is the normal state of the friendship it can leave us feeling worried and anxious. If you worry that ending a friendship might leave you lonely, remember there are many ways to meet new people at university. 

A healthy romantic relationship is built with the same foundation as a friendship, alongside feeling safe and secure with the boundaries you have set.  

Romantic relationships can become unhealthy if there are elements of control — whether that be about your behaviour, friends, money — or disrespectful communication such as being put down, humiliated, embarrassed or hurt.  

When these elements are present in a romantic relationship the abuse can sometimes go further. The University provides advice and guidance for students about sexual misconduct.

How the University can help 

• Student Services offer a range of help including specialist support and resources for your wellbeing and mental health.  
• The Student Union provides students with access to support, social events, and student societies.
• Saints Sport has student sports groups and activities for different skill levels and schedules.
• The Saints Sport Peer Support Network connects students looking to make friends and get guidance on the wider sports community.
• For information on domestic abuse and the University support available, visit the Report+Support website.

Other places to find help 

• The National Domestic Abuse Helpline provides support to people experiencing domestic abuse and can be contacted 24 hours a day.
• The NHS's Bright Sky mobile app offers help to those in abusive relationships or concerned about someone they know.